Saturday, November 29, 2008

Speck On The Way

Erik wrote a song for speck:

Speck on the way

A D E A (verse)

When first I heard about you

I felt my belly drop

Believable incomprehension

The pressure pushed the top

less than a murmur

you rocked in black and white

motivated escalated

better start doing right

bm C#m D E (chorus)

Speck on the Way

Speck on the way

gonna start doin,

all the things

bm C# D E A

Speck on the Way

Speck on the Way

gonnas start doin

all the things I should

But first to Guadalajara

We promised mom a trip

The doctor said that

you'd be made of salsa cricket chips

Para tres semanas

No Dormi bien

wake up in a sweat

wondering what was I thinking


G D F C A (bridge)

Sometimes must we take up step

even though we might not know the way

We hope that that choice will not lead

our dreams too far astray

Later when night has come

and we relfect upon our day

We find out that we are fine and that we are doin okay. Okay.


Friday, November 28, 2008

Week 20 - Doctor Update & Other Stuff

I've added a new feature to the blog site with a link to the preggo book I am currently reading. I figure I can keep it updated as I start on new books, and that way anyone interested in reading with me can join in.

This week I started reading "The Birth Book" by William Sears. It was recommended by almost all of the doulas that I met with last week and has been pretty informative. I was surprised that I was able to plow through half of it just this morning. The more I learn, the more I find myself leaning toward natural birth. I always had this notion about birth, that avoiding drugs and wanting to go natural was some sort of woo-woo, earthy hippy thing or something. But from what I'm learning, I think it's better for mother and baby to have babies the way that your body is made to have babies. Of course I understand that sometimes medical intervention is needed, but I'm starting to see that too often medicine is used for convenience and that it actually can cause complications.

On that note, I did see a new doctor this week (because doctor #2 was just too hard to get an appointment with). But I've decided that since I'm already in flux with my care and not really bonded with any one care giver, I should do some research and shop around. I've got an interview with a midwife center this week that I'm pretty excited about. They do deliveries at a birthing center, but it is very close to the University Hospital which I find reassuring. I might also decide to meet with one other midwifery, just for comparison.

I am scheduled for my ultrasound (through doctor #3) on December 8th. I'm really looking forward to another glimpse at Speck and will only cancel the ultrasound if some other care giver can get me in sooner!

Another exciting advancement this week is that Speck's movements are getting stronger. Erik can now feel many of the kicks (if he can make himself sit still long enough to wait for them to happen), and I can even see the skin on my stomach bouncing around with the baby.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Speck Week 20 - Doctors, Doula's & Registries

The excitement of posting the weekly baby development update has passed, as the baby pretty much looks like a baby now. Whereas I used to be concerned with my body and what was changing, more and more now I find myself focused on getting ready for the future instead.

I've now interviewed with 6 Doulas. It has been an interesting process and I've learned something with each conversation. It's given me some clarity about what I expect from birth, and I've now got a huge reading list (I need to hurry up and finish the Twilight series before the baby books start to arrive from Amazon!). Once I make my decision official I'll post a link to the newest member of our birth team's web site on the blog here.

I've also made the decision to yet again switch doctors. The doctor I "met" with a couple of weeks ago didn't seem very available. I meet with yet another doctor this week, and after some conversations with doulas I've decided to also explore midwives as an option. It's been pointed out that OB's are very surgically minded, and are quick to jump to surgery so that they can (1) maintain control of the situation and (2) do everything possible to avoid malpractice law suits. At this point, I don't know that I would go so far as to say that I want an all natural birth, but I do know I want as smooth of a recovery as possible and I don't want to just jump into a C-Section if it can be avoided.

Another accomplishment this weekend is the baby registry. My friend (and baby mentor) Dana and I went to Babies-R-Us today and she gave me advice on what I do and do not need, and I registered for all kinds of goodies. My hope is that by using a registry to buy baby things, we can have a central shopping list for any friends and family who want to help. This way everyone knows what we need and what has already been purchased. I do plan to look for some items outside of Babies-R-Us, and if/when we purchase things not from the store I will update the registry to show that we no longer need them.

I haven't registered for nursery decor, stroller, or car seats yet--I think these items require a little more research so they will be added later. In the mean time, here is how to get to the registry:

Option 1: In Person Shopping
1. Find your local Babies-R-Us Store (click here)
2. Ask the sales associate to print you a copy of the list
3. Follow directions given to you at the store

Option 2: Shop Online
1. Visit Babies-R-Us website
2. Go to the registry page (or just click here)
3. Search for our list using my name or by our number, 75279995

Thursday, November 20, 2008

What is a Doula

Thank you Kristin, for pointing this out to me. This morning on Today they did a segment on Doulas. Since my last post on hiring a Doula seemed to raise some questions, I thought I'd use this post to share some additional information.

What is a DOULA?

(from the DONA Website)

The word, "doula," comes from the Greek word for the most important female slave or servant in an ancient Greek household, the woman who probably helped the lady of the house through her childbearing. The word has come to refer to "a woman experienced in childbirth who provides continuous physical, emotional, and informational support to the mother before, during and just after childbirth." (Klaus, Kennell and Klaus, Mothering the Mother)

A doula...

Recognizes birth as a key life experience that the mother will remember all her life...

Understands the physiology of birth and the emotional needs of a woman in labor...

Assists the woman and her partner in preparing for and carrying out their plans for the birth...

Stays by the side of the laboring woman throughout the entire labor...

Provides emotional support, physical comfort measures, an objective viewpoint and assistance to the woman in getting the information she needs to make good decisions...

Facilitates communication between the laboring woman, her partner and clinical careproviders...

Perceives her role as one who nutures and protects the woman's memory of her birth experience.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Getting Ready for Speck - Expenses

Well, we are almost at week 18 and most of the last two weeks have been consumed by two things: work and the election. And while this is not a forum for politics, I must say that I am jubilant about the fact that my child will be born in the first 100 days of our Nation's first African-American President. I have no doubt that Speck will grow up to know an America that is forever changed from the one that Erik and I grew up in.

With the comfort of knowing that income is once again on the way, I've been freed up to think about the expenses of maternity. I need to figure these things out so that I can appropriately plan my medical flex spending account (might as well take as many of those pre-tax benefits as possible!!). Hopefully I will be able to sit down with someone at the doctor's office next week and estimate out all of the various insurance costs on the near horizon.

There are two very important services I have been researching (pre-birth and post-birth): Doulas and Nannys.

A Doula is a woman who specializes in childbirth. She attends delivery, is there the entire time, and provides support in any form needed. This includes everything from fetching snacks to pre-natal massage. I've decided that I don't want to put the pressure on Erik to be my sole support system during delivery. Right now I'm lining up interviews and hope to have a Doula selected by month end (so that I can include her costs in my flex account).

I'm also hoping to find a Nanny to help with child care until the baby is old enough to get a benefit out of attending daycare. Ideally, I'd like to find a native Spanish speaker who will also help with cooking and cleaning. I've talked to friends and know that not only do such things exist, but that children who grow up around a Nanny speaking another language are likely to pick up on the second language. It would be great if we could give Speck a head start on his/her bilingual skills. Unfortunately, I don't think you find a Spanish only Nanny on Craigslist or -- so I'm putting my need out there in the world and hoping someone with a lead or two comes across this blog!!